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Poll
How honest are you in your diary?
Totally Honest 20%
Very Honest 0%
Pretty Honest 40%
Somewhat Honest 0%
I don't write non-fiction, and thusly honesty has nothing to do with it. 0%
Somewhat Dishonest 0%
Pretty Dishonest 0%
Very Dishonest 0%
Totally Dishonest 40%

Votes: 5

 Well, let's see what happens...

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jul 12, 2001
 Comments:

I just submitted the erotic story I wrote, under the 'fiction' section. I wonder if it's going to post. I don't know the word count, but it's long. The raw html (I wrote it using bluefish) is 16.4k. Hell, I even threw in a poll.

I guess if it isn't accepted, I'll just go and post it to my diary here. After all, I did put some serious effort into it (about four or five hours, including spell checking) and I'm kind of curious to see what the word count is. Oh, and then there's wondering if the story is actually able to turn anyone on...

diaries

More diaries by Electric Angst
Bwahahahahaha
Feeling So Real
Damnit!
Break My Body, Hold My Bones.
I'm sick. Fuck Off.
I Guess I'm Just a Sick, Sick Bastard.
Damn...
Zippity-do-da
Smile Down on Me
Ow.
Bloody Your Hands on a Cactus Tree...
Oh my Golly!
I Want A Girl With A Mind Like A Diamond
Mister Macho Man, Is It True?
Lust for Life
No L-O-I-T-E-R-I-N-G Allowed
Ever Fallen in Love With Somone You Shouldn't Have Fallen in Love With?
There She Goes...
You're Older Than You've Ever Been. And now You're Even Older.
34 Cent Stamps.
Wish You Were Here
Well...
That girl thinks she's the queen of the neighborhood.
Oh, by the way...
You Know...
-Giving My Goodbye
I'm Gonna Play All Night.
Damn.
Well I'm Just a Modern Guy...
Run Away.
Something in the Way
The Fact That I Adore You is Just One of My Truths.
Play.
It's Over.
Rescindment
Exposition
Extinction
Ho boy I'm Fat!
The funny thing is, trhurler lurks and reads this...
Torn.
World-Wide
The Plan...
Why do I feel good today?
Studies.
Shit I'm Horny!
Damn damn damn.
Good Day
Much and more...
Let the Bible Belt Come and Save My Soul.
A Query.
I know why Europeans hate Americans...
Ok How I Wish...
Rich Man
Thank Goodness.
DSL
Yule is Coming!
Unfettered Boobies
Here We Go...
Dinner Tonight.
You know...

Bah! I feel burned out of typing right now. Still, I want to say something...

You know, I was going to try the same thing I did the last time I wrote something so damn long, ask for a little paypal cash if the reader liked it. Of course, considering the fact that I made absolutly nothing off of that sceme, I doubt that I would do much better here. Then again, people do seem willing to pay for porn on the 'net...

I wonder what the psychological implications are of wanting to write an erotic story to turn on some (semi)vast anonymous crowd. If it some form of literary exhibitionism? No, those are the diaries. Is it the hope that perhaps I'll turn on the ladies and gain a reputation as a sexy stud? No, that's absurd. Is it wanting to be validated as a writer, knowing that you can at the very least stir the primordial emotions of lust? Hrm... That could very well be it.

Ah well. I guess since this is my Adequacy diary, I can go ahead and get honest like I never could at K5...

You see, when I first started my K5 diary, I was going to make it the story of everything in my life. I wasn't going to gloss-over or ignore anything. Whatever I wanted to talk about, I would.

Well, that became problematic when I started writing about my roommate and his girlfriend (now his wife). You see, they'd retire to his bedroom at night, and almost without fail, sometime later I'd hear them going at it. Now, I admit that I did some listening to this initially. There was certainly some healthy human curiosity about what was going on. Eventually, though, it just got to be too much. Laura and I were at a period of time when she still didn't seem to enjoy sex, and to listen to my roommate and his girlfriend enjoying each other so much was like a form of torture.

Oh, and make no mistake, this girl was loud. They'd usually turn music on to hide the sounds, and I'd usually turn up the television, or the radio, and do dishes or something to try and tune it out, and yet her moans were still audible.

So, I wrote a few angst-full passages in my K5 diary about the situation, along with the other crap at that particularly unpleasent moment in my life. Unfortunantly, my roommate found the diary, and was very insulted at me writing about his personal life in it. He talked about being "very upset" and "wanting to kick my ass" (not that he could, he's 6'2" just like me, and he has a longer reach, but I have over 150 pounds on him.)

So, not wanting to ruin what was 'till then a rather frictionless living situation, I e-mailed rusty and begged to have the diary entries deleted. From that point on, I've watched my words when I wrote, and had to be more careful as more people I know read my words. (My writing about Laura is particularly marked with this effect.)

What I write on K5 practically isn't my life anymore. It's become a kind of fiction, in which the characters are slightly idealised versions of those I meet in real life. This is truely unfortunante, because when I look back, I want to look back on my past, not on some fiction...

So, now I have Adequacy. Now I can write freely again, and attempt to get an honest chronicle on what's happening in my life...




Honesty is diaries and erotica (none / 0) (#1)
by typical geek on Thu Jul 12th, 2001 at 09:13:02 AM PST
I'm pretty honest in any diary/weblog thingies I write. But then, not many people close to me in real life browse weblogs, so there's no risk of reprisal.

I embellish the erotica I write, because my sex life, while satisfying, is vanilla and monogamous. So far, though, I base my erotica on real life events and people (or at the real life events and people serve as a starting point).


gcc is to software freedom as guns are to personal freedom.

 
honesty (none / 0) (#2)
by alprazolam on Thu Jul 12th, 2001 at 11:34:36 AM PST
i'd say i'm fairly honest, although i certainly can't put everything i'd like to in my diaries. albeit there is a pretty big difference between what doesn't go into your diary (personal reasons) and what doesn't go into mine (legal). do you really want a 'typical' diary that chronicles your life (that's why i keep one)? maybe you could do that over here and experiment on k5. although i'm not sure how long to expect this site to stay up.


 
Curious (none / 0) (#3)
by xrayspx on Fri Jul 13th, 2001 at 10:24:02 AM PST
I wanted to see how it feels to have your article made "premium" content? It's free, for now, but that is supposed to be changing, yes?

I've seen this discussed, very briefly, before but haven't seen it in practice yet. This is a perfect example. You are Average Citizen, you wrote a story for a weblog, weblog takes your story and charges money for others to read it. Do they give you anything? Or are your words something you'd "donate" to adequacy to pay for servers and bandwidth?

From what I've seen of this site, I'm not very impressed yet. Too troll-ish, but a model that we could see in use elsewhere.


Well... (5.00 / 1) (#4)
by Electric Angst on Fri Jul 13th, 2001 at 12:43:02 PM PST
I'm pretty sure the "Premium content" thing was a joke. Taking a poke at Salon.com for creating a premium service, and then putting anything with nudity or sex into the "Premium content" section and charging people to read it.

If I'm horribly mistaken and they ever do charge, I'd expect to see some kickback. At least along the lines of a free subscription, or naked pictures of the editors, or perhaps the head of trhurler on a silver platter.

Oh, and as far as the content seeming trollish, I see it as a great opportunity to approach serious issues in our culture from a really bizzare point of view. Making you question what you take for granted about certain issues. Personally, I think this will be the type of thing they will use to teach rhetoric to children in the future, once the type of hyper-communications the internet allows becomes more ingrained in everyone's daily life.


--
In the dark times, will there still be singing?
Yes, there will be singing. There will be singing about the dark times. -- Bertolt Brecht

I hope so (none / 0) (#5)
by xrayspx on Fri Jul 13th, 2001 at 03:34:28 PM PST
I'm not familiar enough with Perdida to know if it was a joke or not, I hope it is. I'm definitely willing to stick it out and see how the site matures in any case.


 

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