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Favorite AIDS infection vector:

Rock music   23 votes - 8 %
Smelly anus   17 votes - 6 %
Clean anus   13 votes - 4 %
Toilet seat   16 votes - 5 %
Shady transfusion   14 votes - 4 %
Holding hands   37 votes - 13 %
Toothbrushes   5 votes - 1 %
Goth vampirism   69 votes - 24 %
Chimp bites   24 votes - 8 %
Passing and sharing joints at hippy parties   64 votes - 22 %
 
282 Total Votes

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I don't know where you guys contracted it but... (none / 0) (#1)
by Narcissus on Fri Jul 12th, 2002 at 11:29:47 PM PST
I happened to get mine from hot and sweaty anal sex with a homosexual orangutan. I think that how someone gets this blessed dream of a disease is more important than what whole it came in through.


--------------------------------
Ok, who picked the flower???

 
What about basketball? (none / 0) (#2)
by MessiahWWKD on Mon Jul 15th, 2002 at 01:20:23 PM PST
That's quite dangerous when it comes to STDs.
Guardian angel, heavenly friend, walk with me 'til the journey's end.

 
Um, wow. I mean, wow. (3.00 / 2) (#3)
by Jojothecoward on Tue Jul 16th, 2002 at 07:36:35 PM PST
Without sounding like a pretentious jerk, you people don't really seem to understand the process by which AIDS is contracted. You get it from someone's blood, semen, or vaginal fluids. Also, only humans can have it. So, basically, the only way to get AIDS from the above list is gothic vampirism, and if that's going around, well, YOU'VE GOT WAY WORSE PROBLEMS THAN AIDS!!!


A Point by Point Rebuttal! (5.00 / 2) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 17th, 2002 at 02:44:40 AM PST
Kinda. It's quite possible to get THE AIDS from a clean and/or smelly anus, a shady transfusion, and chimp bites. Also, if I held hands with someone after a particularly grueling session with a pair of exacto blades, then I could get THE AIDS as well. Similarly, if a person just brushed his/her teeth with enough vigor to draw blood, and I then used his/her toothbrush afterwards, there is a chance I could be afflicted with THE AIDS. You can use the same principle with the toilet seat also.

I personally contracted THE AIDS after watching a particularly rousing show by GWAR, which I then passed around to all my hippy buddies by sharing a joint with them soaked in my own blood (as was the custom amongst us atheist Satan worshipping peaceniks). Coincidentally, they were all suffering from cuts and open sores on their lips, presumably caused by the herpes we passed around during the vigorous sessions of group oral sex that we participated in continually. Ah, good times.

Coincidentally, there is a large sum of money that I'm trying to transfer out of Nigeria, and I am asking you, good sir, if I can use your bank account for these purposes. You would, of course, be entitled to a cut of the cash. Would you be interested?


WHAHAHA (none / 0) (#5)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 17th, 2002 at 03:11:15 AM PST
I liked the part about the Nigeria money transfer the best...


 


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