The economic miracle that was started off by Ronald Reagan in the 80s, and continued through the George Bush Sr and Clinton administrations is one the wonders of the modern world. The solid economic base of Amreica, coupled with the explosion of the American designed world-wide-web and Internet have created opportunities for all regardless of education, race, sex or class. Anyone in America who wants a job will be able to take their pick from a selection of attractive and highly paid positions due to the strength of the American economy.

So why is it then that the middle classes have taken to faking diseases and why are otherwise respectable physicians joining in this collective fraud ?

Dyslexia, M.E., Attention Deficit Disorder, Repetitive Strain Injury, Anorexia. You have probably heard of these diseases before. At least one of your co-workers has probably taken time off work for one of these 'illnesses' in the last month. And yet, up until now no evidence has been produced to support the existence of any these afflictions as actual medical conditions. Let's analyse these 'sicknesses' one by one.

• Dyslexia. This is the 'diagnosis' given to a middle class child who cannot read owing to low intelligence. It is an attempt to medicalize a problem which in reality is a social one: All men are not created equal. When God gave out the brains, some of us were fortunate enough to be given a shiny new BMW 7-Series sedan, some of us got '97 5.0 Mustang, and some of us (the unfortunate few) got nothing more than an old skateboard.
  
  Dyslexia does not exist. Stupid children who cannot read do exist.
  
  
• M.E. (also known as the 'yuppie flu'). Again the middle classes cannot stomach the fact that they are not superhuman beings. Consequently when one of them needs to take a day off work, due to being what normal people would call "tired" they medicalize the problem (by giving it a long medical-sounding name) and hey-presto you can get all the time off work you want. Not bad for simply being tired. I wonder what our forefathers who built America by the sweat of their brows would say to a modern yuppie suffering from M.E. ?
  
  M.E. does not exist. People who need to go to bed a bit earlier do exist.

• Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). This one is quite sinister. For thousands of years, children were allowed to be carefree spirits, wandering wherever the mood took them. Investigating a world which is new and fresh to them, getting distracted when something more interesting came along. This was called 'a childhood'. In the modern hell that is middle-class America, a child is not allowed to have a healthy curiosity. No. The moment a child behaves like children have done for thousands of years, the middle class parent reaches for the Ritalin, to dope the poor kid up to better fit with his middle-class golf-playing lifestyle.
  
  ADD does not exist. Healthy childhood curiosity does exist.
  
  
• RSI. (repetitive strain injury). Another medicalization of a non-medical problem. For centuries it was well known that if you did something repetative for a long time, it could have consequences. Cowboys doing their bit to tame the wild frontier often became 'saddle sore'. Railwaymen laying the tracks across our great continent suffered 'sleeper driver's ear' where the noise from banging in the sleepers to the ground would become too much. In both these cases the 'cure' was simple. Stop what you are doing for a while. The pain would then go away. RSI is supposedly caused by typing. The message to these middle-class whiners who suffer from this pseudo-disease is simple: Take a 5 minute break.
  
  RSI does not exist. People who need a five minute break but are too stupid to take it do exist.
  
  
• Anorexia (Anorexia Nervosa, also Bulimia). Another disease created as a cover for general stupidity. In the bountiful society of modern America, everyone has as much food as they can consume, there is no need for anyone to go hungry. It is almost like 'Star Trek' where technology has progressed to the point where there is a surplus of all material goods. So why then do teenage girls feel the need to starve themselves ?
  
  Anorexia does not exist. Stupid people who need to get some lunch do exist.

All these "diseases" or "illnesses" have been conjured up from thin-air by the middle class (in collusion with the big pharmaceutical corporations), in order that they can have an excuse to skive off work, or to make them seem more exciting and interesting than their lower-class peers.

The conversation at the country club probably goes something like this: "Your child is stupid because he cannot read. But my child has Dyslexia, which is an illness."

I have to ask, when will Americans with common sense stand up and put a stop to the ridiculous nonsense coming from our middle classes ? The media is guilty of collaboration in this scam. When was the last time you saw a mainstream magazine article or TV programme come out and state the bald truth about these fake diseases ? Am I the only one concerned that modern America seems to have become a haven for the workshy ?

Let me give you a concrete example of this phenomenon: Only last week I went to my local coffee shop only to find it was closed due to 'staff sickness'. The next day I asked the barista why they had been unable to open that day. "Bill had a relapse of his M.E., Lisa's kid had to go to the doctors about his dyslexia and Amy was suffering a bout of bulimia" was the frightening response.

To put this into plain English, I was deprived of my daily coffee because Bill is a lazy shirker, Lisa has a dumb kid, and Amy is simply stupid.

What has happened to America ? We used to be such a nation of go-getters with can-do attitudes. Not any more.

Have any readers noticed any other fake illnesses that I have missed out ? What can be done about these people ? Maybe you have been 'diagnosed' by your doctor with one of these fake illnesses ? Perhaps you have a story to share about the moment you realised you had been taken for a ride by the medical profession...