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crud

Author:

osm

Topic:

Diaries

Posted:

Oct 04, 2001

Comments:

i was doing so well with my newfound misogyny. then i had to go and have a dream about Natalie Portman last night/this morning/this afternoon. now, i am forced to find a way to reconcile Natalie's utter perfection with the fact i would just as soon spit on a female as look at it.

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	opalhawk's childlike innocence
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	Can't sleep? Bored with the same-ol' same-ol'?
	no sleep for the weary
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	smaerd dicul htiw erutnevda yadnus
	a new hope
	life changing event
	help wanted
	life is grand
	rain
	surgical strikes
	decisions, decisions
	lifestyle changes in face of terrorism
	lesbian update
	what a freak
	MY weird uncle benny
	Why Natalie Portman Is Better Than Any Of You
	exorcising haunted attics
	we've hit the big time, baby!
	has natalie met her match??
	unfortunately, she speaks english
	a whole new perspective
	Hell in a Handbasket
	famous last words
	I Miss Hauntedattics
	Startling Revelation
	Occupying America
	Super Bowl Commercial
	Happy Birthday, Reagan
	OB-La-Di, OB-La-Da
	Happy Valentine's Day!
	The Day the Dopes Came Over
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	clusterlizard survives barage of hacking attempts!
	I haven't been getting a whole lot of sleep
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	Queen Mum Spontaneously Reanimates, Does Elvis Imitation

	Pop Music (none / 0) (#1)
	by Peter Johnson on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 01:44:50 PM PST

	"It Ain't Easy" by Ron Davies: When you climb to the top of the mountain Look out over the sea Think about the places perhaps, where a young man could be Then you jump back down to the rooftops Look out over the town Think about all of the strange things circulating round CHORUS It ain't easy, it ain't easy It ain't easy to get to heaven when you're going down Well all the people have got their problems That ain't nothing new With the help of the good Lord We can all pull on through We can all pull on through Get there in the end Sometimes it'll take you right up and sometimes down again CHORUS Satisfaction, satisfaction Keep me satisfied I've got the love of a Hoochie Koochie woman She calling from inside She's a-calling from inside Trying to get to you All the woman really wants you can give her something too CHORUS (x2) --Peter Are you adequate?

	Ooooohhhhhh... (none / 0) (#2)
	by chloedancer on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 02:30:12 PM PST

	Once more with feeling, Scully!

	Bah! (none / 0) (#6)
	by CaptainZornchugger on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 07:40:51 PM PST

	You only know that song because Bowie covered it.

	Uh-oh, now I'm worried (none / 0) (#3)
	by hauntedattics on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 02:53:27 PM PST

	RE: your reference to the female of the species as "it" in your last sentence. Intentional or un-? Because if intentional, Natalie Portman notwithstanding, you have the misogyny disease pretty bad. I can suggest some potential cures for you, if you aren't afraid of cooties.

	disease?! (5.00 / 1) (#4)
	by osm on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 03:11:16 PM PST

	i think not. i've never before seen with such great clarity. don't try to cast your spell on me, you vile creature. i am impervious. i will not succumb to your tortures. i will not be your toy, dancing on a string like a fool for your amusement. ptewey.

	My apologies... (none / 0) (#7)
	by hauntedattics on Fri Oct 5th, 2001 at 08:33:05 AM PST

	You may be seeing clearly, but how much fun are you having? You may not be succumbing to my wiles, my dear, but you are providing me with endless amusement... And please don't spit, it's not chivalrous.

	p.s. (5.00 / 1) (#5)
	by osm on Thu Oct 4th, 2001 at 04:48:00 PM PST

	Natalie Portman bow your head when you say that.

	strip clubs (none / 0) (#8)
	by alprazolam on Fri Oct 5th, 2001 at 12:34:44 PM PST

	you need to go to a quality strip club. that will make you forget natalie. make sure to bring lots of twenties.

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