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It seems to be an almost weekly occurance. Some poorly reared child brings a weapon to school and threatens or harms a fellow student or a member of the faculty. Despite valiant efforts Zero Tolerance policies have largely failed, either through obviously ridiculous punishment or through failure to identify the real threat. Efforts to understand these misanthropes have met a similar fate. Kids are still killing or maiming one another in record quantity. What's a polite society to do?
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Complex problems such as these need to be broken down into their root causes. It is through extensive analysis that we are sure to not only relieve the immediate effects, but to prevent any future recurrence.
Issue #1: The Decline of Morality Let students pray. It isn't all that difficult. Just because some Hindu child might be offended by the student next to him loudly praising God is no reason to allow generation after generation to slip further down the slope. Not only are we stifling the freedom of religion and speech, but we are preventing countless millions of children from leading countless millions of their peers to the one thing that will give them hope, direction, and salvation: The Christian Church. The ridiculous doctrine of the seperation of Church and state has caused innumerable harms to our society. Relentless efforts by the left have brought us to our current state of near lawlessness. Callous disregard for human life can be seen in the eyes of many of our young people, and it is borne out in the horrific actions we often see them take. Mindless liberals try to blame bullies, sports heroes, capitalism, or society at large for not 'accepting' these misfit kids. We are supposed to bear the weight of their misdeeds on our own shoulders, supposedly because we didn't spend enough time trying to understand their problems. Stop reading this sentence if you are under 18, but I say that is bullshit. How can we help the oddballs of our society get back in line with normality? Send them to Church. Church is where a person learns right and wrong. The Church doesn't hold individuality above all else. It doesn't blindly accept all manner of weirdness in the name of keeping an 'open mind' or bolstering a person's self esteem. Somehow, somewhere there have to be some absolute standards, nothing can provide those like Christianity. Of course we can try to teach this at home, but the professional preachers typically do a much better job of driving the message home. Coupled with a strong and pervasive Chrisrian message at school the minds of our lost sheep will be turned around in no time. No effort to rebuild the moral character of the nation would be complete without some measures to strengthen the family. Right now, schools across the country offer daycare services. This seemingly helpful program seeks to chip away at the traditional two parent household. By offering to care for the kids before and after school they encourage women to step out of their traditional roles as housewives and enter the cutthroat world of corporate America. This movement makes the ridiculous claim that 'today's woman' can balance both a career and a family. Further eroding and victimizing women is the feminist movement, which makes the claim that the family should come second to a woman's professional goals. The results of this are plain to see: Young people all over the country are coming unglued at the seams. They cannot handle the day to day stresses that are part and parcel of growing up. A solid two parent household, that is there for them in their time of need, is an essential component in correcting this, clergy can go only so far. Issue #2: Ill Preparedness It is inevitable, despite the best efforts of a good society and its Church, that some wayward individual will stray from the righteous path and seek to cause harm to his peers. It behooves us all to take the steps necessary for our children to fend off attack no matter how remote the possibility. Indeed, the fact that the benefits of our long term solutions for strengthening morality and the family may take several generations to reap further reinforces the need to immediately educate and equip our young people, teachers, staff, and administrators to effectively deal with this eventuality. The one universal rule at most schools in America is: No Firearms. This is the one common element of every single school shooting that has occurred in America over the past 10 years. Every one of the morally depraved, Godless, leftist bullies knew full well that, according to the rules, no one inside the school would be heeled. They knew that when they walked in to that school they would not be taking fire. It would be like shooting fish in a barrel, like sitting ducks, safer than knocking over a Kwikee-Mart. Does this make any sense at all? Take a look at the response of schools all across the country in the wake of each violent incident: They all packed their buildings with armed guards! Why? People with guns deter crime. In the wake of the September 11th attacks America is warming to this fact by considering allowing its pilots to carry guns. This simple and cost effective approach will no doubt decrease the number of people who will gain access to cockpits, if someone tries a bullet in their head will be their reward. Look across the ocean, at the UK, those people are being murdered in droves because they have allowed themselves to be disarmed. Not only do they fall victim to the criminal element, but their entire society is now in the unenviable position of being ripe for government led plunder. It is beyond the shadow of a doubt the guns in the hands of the common person means freedom from tyranny, why should this not be true for our schools? Now that the fallacy of No Firearms rules providing security for our students has been exposed we must consider how we will arm our teachers, staff, and students. Long guns are obviously not the best choice. They are unwieldy to carry throughout the day and difficult to stow in a typical grade school locker. There is also the problem of many of today's young people being a bit weak, I don't doubt that some of the younger ones would be unable to hold a steady aim when shooting a rifle offhand. For these reasons we should consider awarding our school firearm contract to a solid American manufacturer of pistols, Freedom Arms. What better source for the means by which the death grip of violence will finally be loosened from our schools? The company name fits our purpose so well, no one but the staunchest, freedom hating, secular humanist could argue. Yes, Freedom Arms will be the means by which we remove the shackles of oppression from our young ones and provide them with the tools they need to succeed. In addition to equipping our students and administrators with fine Freedom Arms pistols, we must back up the guns with training. We cannot assume that every set of parents has taught their child proper firearm safety, much less to shoot straight. We must recognize that many families have shirked this responsibility for one reason or another. The insane idea that guns are bad, the reduction in the number of hunters, the spread of athieism, all have contributed to the removal of basic firearms training from households across America. Luckily there is a considerable base of retired military men who could provide quality instruction at a moments notice. We should call upon these men to develop a program to train everyone who spends their day in school to care for their weapon, to fire it, and to position themselves against incoming fire. Before long our young people will be as well versed in the Weaver position as they will be in the Word of God. In stark contrast to their current state, they will be safer, happier, and better prepared for a life of serving God. With work and commitment we can finally return our schools to their lofty perch as the place children can go to not only learn the three Rs, but to learn about life. I should point out that my wife home schools our children, primarliy because the Pennsylvania area is deeply ensconced in the sort of depravity I describe above, and I cannot take the chance that one of my precious children could be murdered while waiting for reforms to be enacted. Regardless, getting the Lord back in lives of our young people, putting guns in their hands, and giving them some basic combat knowledge just might ensure that my grandchildren can safely be allowed to hop on a big yellow bus and go to school with their neighbor.
Understand that these suggestions are of the utmost importance. Every minute we waste arguing over whether solution A is the best possible one for a given situation for a given person we will lose another young life. Please end the bickering and selfishness and allow your children to be saved.
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