Burma Shave!

Stories

Diaries

Polls

Users

Web Adequacy.org

Home

About

Topics

Rejects

Abortions

This is an unofficial archive site only. It is no longer maintained. You can not post comments. You can not make an account. Your email will not be read. Please read this page or the footnote if you have questions.

Poll

Burma Shave!

	Every shaver now can snore six more minutes than before.	9%
	The 50-cent jar, so large, by heck, even the Scotch now shave the neck.	9%
	A shave that's real, no cuts to heal, a soothing velvet after-feel.	0%
	The answer to a maiden's prayer is not a chin of stubbly hair.	27%
	Within this vale of toil and sin, your head grows bald - but not your chin.	18%
	Romances are wrecked before they begin by a hair on the coat or a lot on the chin.	0%
	Here's something that could even soak the whiskers off a radio joke.	0%
	Remember this if you'd be spared - trains don't whistle because they're scared.	9%
	Trains don't wander all over the map, for nobody sits in the engineer's lap.	18%
	My cheek, says she, feels smooth as satin. Ha ha, he says, that's mine you're pattin'.	9%

Votes: 11

Burma Shave!

Author:

nathan

Topic:

Diaries

Posted:

May 11, 2002

Comments:

Free offer! Free offer!

More diaries by nathan

	Bartok violin concerto
	religion has failed us.
	addition to previous diary (sorry)
	Why girls are better than boys
	tangential point off h.a.'s recent diary
	why boys and girls are different
	new job!
	objectivist club
	Another Friday night
	some light reading
	the opposite sex
	hey, alprazolam,
	jerkcity
	g**k math is not hard.
	liberalism
	why?
	hedonism
	should women?
	a new threat
	wiccan woes
	is Christianity theistically monistic?
	complaint
	give me advice.
	Canada rules!
	do some atheists hate religion?

Rip a fender
Off your car
And mail it in
For a half-pound jar
Of Burma-Shave!

	Erm (none / 0) (#1)
	by iat on Sat May 11th, 2002 at 03:48:16 PM PST

	The haiku contest was held at a different Scoop site. And you've missed the closing date for the haiku contest. Oh, and you've got the wrong number of lines and syllables for a haiku too. But we appreciate your input, we really do. Perhaps you should share the fruits of your creativity with this wank5est? Adequacy.org - love it or leave it.

	I know you must be joking (none / 0) (#2)
	by nathan on Sat May 11th, 2002 at 04:31:00 PM PST

	Since the Adequacy uses proprietary software, not some Open Sores crap. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Oh? And what software's that then? (n/t) (none / 0) (#3)
	by budlite on Sat May 11th, 2002 at 04:52:46 PM PST

	duh (none / 0) (#4)
	by nathan on Sat May 11th, 2002 at 05:49:20 PM PST

	I have no idea, because it's proprietary and I'm not an editor yet. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Adequacy Scoop (none / 0) (#5)
	by iat on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:07:56 AM PST

	Our proprietary webloag software is called "Adequacy Scoop", which is a code fork of kuro5hin's Scoop software. It is proprietary software and as you will see from our Sourceforge page, we do not release the source code for our modifications. But, as we are not distributing binary copies, we have no obligation to release the source code under the terms of the GPL. Adequacy.org - love it or leave it.

	So why bother putting it on sourceforge? (n/t) (none / 0) (#6)
	by budlite on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 03:56:50 AM PST

	Why not? (none / 0) (#9)
	by iat on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 06:31:49 AM PST

	Sourceforge provides lots of useful free features like mailing lists and shell accounts. It would be rude not to take advantage of such a good facility, wouldn't it? Besides, having a Sourceforgepage helps to antagonise Free software advocates who think we're morally obliged to share our source. Adequacy.org - love it or leave it.

	It is good to salvage what is useful. (none / 0) (#24)
	by elenchos on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 08:19:20 PM PST

	I think it is visionary to get something good out of Open Source, without following every single component of the philosophy. Namely, not following the part about sharing source code. If you take that out, Open Source has some potential, which our SourceForgery page will demostrate to a stunned programmer community. I do, I do, I do --Bikini Kill

	Haiku is not poetry. (none / 0) (#8)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 05:20:12 AM PST

	For something to be poetry, it has to satisfy two requirements: It has to have either a rhythmic or rhyming structure. It has to have a verbal component. Otherwise, it isn't poetry. Besides, what's the point in a westerner writing haiku? That's as stupid and ridiculous as a crucified Santa Claus in a Japanese storefront. In short, don't act like an idiot: don't write haiku. Really, don't. -- Peace and much love...

	Poetry (none / 0) (#10)
	by iat on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 06:36:16 AM PST

	For something to be poetry, it has to satisfy two requirements: It has to have either a rhythmic or rhyming structure. It has to have a verbal component. Have you any idea how many high school "poets" you've just upset? That's as stupid and ridiculous as a crucified Santa Claus in a Japanese storefront. The difference being that I'd be interested to see a crucified Santa at Harrod's in Tokyo, but most "Haiku" has no redeeming qualities. Adequacy.org - love it or leave it.

	Good. (none / 0) (#11)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 06:39:15 AM PST

	High-school poets must die. -- Peace and much love...

	Most high school poets do "die"... (none / 0) (#12)
	by hauntedattics on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 07:26:48 AM PST

	when they grow up and become useful and productive members of society. This is an extremely good thing. Especially for the rest of us.

	Isn't that the point of high-school? (none / 0) (#15)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 08:59:02 AM PST

	i.e. to act out the worst sides of your personality, so that in later life you don't feel tempted to do something stupid? -- Peace and much love...

	It's usually not even haiku. (none / 0) (#13)
	by because it isnt on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 08:03:45 AM PST

	It's almost always senryu instead. But these psueds don't care, because they use the "haiku" form to imbue banal and uninspired quips with undeserved cachet. adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	^_^ (5.00 / 1) (#14)
	by Anonymous Reader on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 08:55:34 AM PST

	is senryu anything like bukkake or hentai?

	Why not look it up? (none / 0) (#16)
	by because it isnt on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 12:47:34 PM PST

	Use a Japanese-English dictionary. Select "Japanese word in Romaji" mode. adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	Quote from the link (none / 0) (#26)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue May 14th, 2002 at 06:43:15 PM PST

	Like a tattoo of Japanese kanji characters on the ankle of a pierced hipster who has no idea what they mean, haiku is a sad example of the conversion of important aspects of Eastern culture into status symbols for those in the know. I think it's funny that he assumed the tattoos were kanji. It seems more likely they were intended as Chinese symbols. His attitude apparently is that since the Japanese copied the Chinese first, the hipsters MUST have copied the Japanse. It's only logical after all.

	Earth to everybody... (none / 0) (#17)
	by gohomeandshoveit on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 01:13:59 PM PST

	...The Burma Shave thing wasn't a poem. It was a bunch of randomly strewn words in five lines that just so happened to strike some misguided people as poetry. I hope that I cleared that up for all of you. You don't wanna step into a big pile of shit - Fred Durst

	Earth to misguided person. (none / 0) (#18)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:07:31 PM PST

	Sure, why not simply discount the centuries of experience humanity has in writing phonetic poetry. Dirty philistine. -- Peace and much love...

	You want poetry? (none / 0) (#19)
	by The Mad Scientist on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:29:52 PM PST

	Waiting for make is such a bore Waiting for a.out to stop dumping core Waiting for some cycles all day long Waiting for adb to tell me what went wrong... I don't know from where it is, though, but at least it talks about something concrete. Or, a part from something longer, apparently very old... The user writes programs which crash when they can Not assembler code, but unstructured FORTRAN He works all the day with a mouse in his hand And has troubles with bitwise binary AND.

	Geek "humour". (none / 0) (#20)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:37:51 PM PST

	Geek "humour" is very tedious. I mean, why does it always have to be so forced? Anyways, I never liked it. If you want to write about "geeky" stuff, I think you need to find an appropriate form for presenting it -- if you merely substitute the words in a lyrical poem, you end up with something very much like the above. -- Peace and much love...

	funny thing (none / 0) (#21)
	by nathan on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:43:00 PM PST

	I've met tons of students in almost every discipline who are musical or otherwise artistic. In particular, medical students seem to have a much higher proportion of music-lovers (and skilled performers, for that matter) than the has the general public. While I have met CS majors who are artistically aware, I have never met a gk who is. Gks of the engineering-hentai manga-Lunix stripe seem not to have what we might call the higher human feelings. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Actually, (none / 0) (#25)
	by tkatchev on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 11:02:08 PM PST

	G**ks are the worst breed of programmer. Sure, they can be taught to do the most menial and annoying tasks, (i.e. maintaining Perl CGI) if inefficiently, but I wouldn't trust one to program anything more complex than a webpage. -- Peace and much love...

	Art critics... (none / 0) (#23)
	by The Mad Scientist on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 03:15:02 PM PST

	...are like eunuchs in a harem. They know everything about how, but they apparently can't.

	Renewing your poetic license. (none / 0) (#22)
	by because it isnt on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 02:43:32 PM PST

	"Burma-Shave is a work of fiction". This site finds you in contradiction. Burma-Shave! adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	Happy (none / 0) (#7)
	by Anonymous Reader on Sun May 12th, 2002 at 04:00:02 AM PST

	Mothers Day Nathan! I do hope your children remember.

	I like it. (none / 0) (#27)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue May 14th, 2002 at 06:58:35 PM PST

	Nathan has turned an advertising jinkle into a surreal work of art. The poem is carefully haphazard. The imagery is interesting. In six lines Nathan makes a cutting statement about the comercialised society without coming off as preachy or taking himself too seriously. Take a bow, Nathan. You did well. -gNinja

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective companies. Comments are owned by the Poster. The Rest ® 2001, 2002, 2003 Adequacy.org. The Adequacy.org name, logo, symbol, and taglines "News for Grown-Ups", "Most Controversial Site on the Internet", "Linux Zealot", and "He just loves Open Source Software", and the RGB color value: D7D7D7 are trademarks of Adequacy.org. No part of this site may be republished or reproduced in whatever form without prior written permission by Adequacy.org and, if and when applicable, prior written permission by the contributing author(s), artist(s), or user(s). Any inquiries are directed to legal@adequacy.org.