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 Taboo: The Downfall of America

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jan 17, 2002
 Comments:
It is common practice in Germany for adults to massage the genitalia of babies in order to calm them. Violent crime is also extremely low in Germany. A German visiting America for the first time is often shocked at the violence exhibited by Americans.

"In Germany, you win a fight by having the courage to walk away," you may hear your dirndl-wearing friend say.

Indeed, a German acquaintance of mine has uttered these very words. The concept of sexual abuse was also alien to her. This near-utopia is no accident. The German people realized long ago that it is more harmful to deny our most human sexual impulses than it is to punish them.

sex

More stories about Sex
Lolita's World: The disturbing tendencies of the modern man.
Solving Teen Pregnancy
Homosexuality - Is it the next evolutionary step for mankind ?
Open Letter to a Stripper
The Sinister Secret of our Schools
Don't look at me.
My husband wants to do my ass!
'English Style Lovers', with jsm
I'm a teenager, and I want it bad!
I have not had relations for months!
My neighbors are foreigners, and they don't fly a flag
Should we circumcize our boy?
Active recruiting
My wife hungers for dark meat, and my nephew is a Commie!
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode I
My husband wants me shorn!
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode II
My inlaws are not fertile!
The Time is Right for Manual Sex
Help save a baby, and snowballs
The supposedly civilized Europeans. (A WARNING TO ALL AMERICANS)
It's all about the numbers
Caffeinated mints, and getting into the body you desire.
Why can't I get a second date?
The Heterosexual Geek's Guide to Feigning Homosexuality
I want a mistress!
Mommyism in the Workplace
Lesbian Parenting and the Myth of Gay Children
My roommate is gay! My roommate is a drunk.

More stories by
osm

Holes
Natalie Portman Desensitized Me
Review: Planet of the Apes
Kicking the Cat
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode I
Uncle OSM's Guide to Covert Dating: Episode II
Richard M. Stallman: Portrait of a Pirate Hacker (in Layman's Terms)
Where Do You Stand in the GNU World Order?
Linux Zealot Gets Educated
The Motherland

I dare anyone reading this article to attempt to survive a year without sexual contact of any sort. Not even masturbation. Imagine the seething, raw anger that would build within your gut. Now, multiply this by 12 years - the average age at which an American loses his or her virginity - and it becomes clear why our society is violently spiraling out of control.

Of course, America wasn't always that way. It is a problem that is rooted in the "sexual revolution" of the sixties and worsened ever since. Prior to the sixties, incest and pedo-stimulation were not discussed in public. They were kept as treasured memories within the family.

Here, I will explore seven areas of sexual perversion and how they are rooted in our treatment of children. Perhaps one day we can turn our nation back into the peaceful, quiet homey place it was before the Age of Oprah.

The Sado-Masochism Perversion

The increased interest by Americans in acts of sado-masochism are one reflection of the nation's crisis. Children yearn to be punished in the proper context. With the advent of "Time-out" and other fluffy punishments, we have robbed our children of one of the most important aspects of growing up: the privilege to be whipped with a hickory stick.

This neglect, which is the true child abuse, leads to an overcompensating tendency in the adult to seek out physical abuse. And our population, denied the psycho-soothing effects of pedo-stimulation, is only too happy to oblige.

Children must be disciplined with intense physical pain.

The Infidelity Perversion

Men and women alike are betraying their partners in frightening numbers these days. Recent studies have shown as many as 89% of the population has been unfaithful with at least two different partners. This is another overcompensating tendency in the adult, produced by the lack of pedo-stimulation. Children of either sex are attracted to their parent of the opposite sex. The child desires sexual fulfillment from that parent at a subconscious level. When these desires are left unanswered, the child matures into an adult with an abnormal burning hunger for sexual contact. Infidelity is the disturbing result.

Children must experience sexual relations with a parent of the opposite sex.

The Homosexuality Perversion

Not surprisingly, lack of pedo-stimulation can also result in homosexuality. The under-stimulated child is left with a confused gender identity when ignored by the parent of the opposite sex.

"Doesn't mommy find me attractive as a male?" Young Johnny wonders.

"Maybe I'm not supposed to like daddy," ponders young Suzy.

The same sort of confusion can result if the child is pedo-stimulated by a parent of the same sex.

Children must experience sexual relations with a parent of the opposite sex.

The Rape Perversion

Rape is another man-made perversion. The concept shouldn't even exist in society. The concept of rape is only meaningful in the context of sex as a bad thing. This is probably the greatest problem our nation must overcome: the idea that sex is bad.

The German people have no concept of rape. There is no word for it in the German language and there are no rape statistics for Germany. Rape simply cannot exist in a sexually open culture. From the German example, it is apparent that pedo-stimulation is a great factor in the elimination of the concept of sex as "wrong".

Children must be sexually stimulated to promote sexual openness.

The Bestiality Perversion

This is a very disturbed individual indeed. This problem can be traced back to two primary issues: the lack of pedo-stimulation and the failure of parents to neuter their pets while their children are maturing.

A stimulation-starved child has nowhere else to turn but to the family pet. Of course, Spot is only too happy to comply with the sexually curious child, since Spot has not had its own sexual desire extinguished.

The child is further encouraged when it witnesses two family pets engaged in intercourse. This may cause such profound distress in the under-stimulated child that it is sure to grow up to be a proud guest on Oprah.

The importance of spaying/neutering has never been more evident than it is now.

Family pets must be neutered.

The Coprophilia Perversion

Under-stimulated children are also in danger of this affliction. The lack of sexual stimulation can produce an intense obsession with body excretions. The child, feeling unloved throughout its formative years, grows into an adult of intense perversion. An adult obsessed with the consumption or production of feces during sex.

There is only one preventative measure for this perverse behavior: a fully satisfying sex life during childhood.

The Necrophilia Perversion

This last perversion can be traced back to a child's feeding habits. Children who are not breast-fed quickly learn to associate the dead plastic of a bottle with sexuality. The mature adult seeks to sate his/her need for the security of infancy by seeking the attentions of the deceased. This is obviously not productive and creates an even deeper obsession in the adult.

Children must be breast-fed, preferably while being sexually stimulated.

Conclusion

Countless examples exist in our society as to the negative effects of child neglect. Further, comparisons with our German counterparts shows the positive aspects of incestuous relations and proper discipline.

It's time we turned our nation around. So, the next time your child is screaming incessantly, spank them hard and love them good.


Those were the days (5.00 / 2) (#8)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 06:37:32 AM PST
Your German friend must be very old.
I've been told that about sixty years ago, my dear Deutschland was truly idyllic. True, there was some genocide, ethnic cleansing and whatnot, but disgusting sexual perversion of the sort discussed here was an absolute non-issue.

Then came the American capitalist Schweinehunde and forcibly impregnated the German psyche with the same tainted mentality that ended up leading to the "60's phenomenon". Ach ja, it is as though Germany has become an extension of American sexual history, with the same flawed methods being applied to child-rearing, resulting in similarly sexually frustrated individuals. These end up committing Vergewaltigung und Inzest, and bringing shame on their Fatherland's sexual traditions.

Though your article comes several decades late, I thank osm for bringing the horrendous crimes of American soldiers to the forefront. Their legacy is the destruction of one of the richest sexual cultures in the modern world.


 
Rotfl (2.33 / 3) (#9)
by Urzahil on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 07:12:18 AM PST
Rotfl


 
Nice (5.00 / 1) (#13)
by Kabn on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 03:26:06 PM PST
Hilarious.

BTW, I went on a voluntary four-year "fast" of sorts from all women. Figured there were better things to spend my time/money/thoughts on. And recently I went a month (30 days) without any sexual occurances at all, including masturbation. Just felt like I needed to do it; maybe I'm crazy.

If anyone has read Deadeye Dick by Kurt Vonnegut, they know how I feel.
"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

Re: Nice (1.00 / 1) (#17)
by eMan on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 04:02:45 PM PST
You're ten years old, right? Perhaps you can tell us about the pain and rage...


No (5.00 / 1) (#28)
by Kabn on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 07:17:18 PM PST
Nineteen, actually.

Not really an adult, but I consider myself more mature than most of my friends that endure all the bullshit of a relationship that won't last three months for a bit of ass.

From theonion.com: "Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75."
"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

words to live by (none / 0) (#30)
by osm on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 07:20:06 PM PST
Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75.


 
You know what? (none / 0) (#31)
by MessiahWWKD on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 08:01:31 PM PST
Sounds to me like somebody can't keep a steady relationship.
Guardian angel, heavenly friend, walk with me 'til the journey's end.

never (4.00 / 1) (#36)
by Kabn on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 10:26:25 PM PST
I've never had one because I've never tried to have one. I don't really trust myself to be faithful, nor do I see the reason for relationships at this point in my life. Sex is about all people hook up for (pardon the dangling preposition, it's late), and to be quite honest, I'm not that interested in sex. Again, I just took two economics classes: If the cost (not price, they are two different things) of something is higher than the utility gained, it is not in one's best interests to do it. Plus, I'm just not that much of a sexual being. You might say my libido lacks.

Again, just my opinion. Maybe subconsciously I'm just afraid of committment. Maybe I don't feel like being controlled by a woman through my sexual urges. Whatever.
"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

What you need to do. (none / 0) (#49)
by elenchos on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 07:50:05 PM PST
Probably you either have some very obvious social handicap like obesity or acne so severe that it frightens small children, in which case you should not be afraid to get professional help, or else you have something wrong with you that you are totally unaware of. If it is the first one, talk to your doctor and work out a realistic plan to solve the problem. You really can take control and have the life you want.

It could be something you don't realize, like some terrible odor. Food allergy perhaps? The first step is to sit down with a close friend and demand that they be brutally honest. Say, "look, I'm 19 and I have zero romantic prospects. What is it? My breath? What?" Get them to tell you what it is. Maybe you need to change your personality some. Whatever it is, there are time-tested methods of behavior modification or medical treatment that will make life worth living for you. Don't suffer any longer! Take control!

"I'm not a sexual being." Holy christ almighty! What are you then? An amoeba? A lamp? You're a human being and you need to get some, okay? And that commitment nonsense is just more rationalization. What does commitment have to do with getting laid? Sure, it's nice to have a double wide with a car port, but if you just want the double wide, no car port just yet, fine! Get just the double wide and leave the accessories for later.

Don't overlook basic grooming and clothing choices either. A "for Dummies" book is the place to start for that kind of thing if you are really clueless about, say, what kind of shoes look good.

Speaking of which, could you be gay? Think about it. There is happiness around the corner for you here too, if that is what the problem is. Who do you think about when you masturbate? Men or women? Whichever it is, go with it!!! Don't be some miserable 30 year old virgin full of regrets.

So try that stuff for starters, and let us know how it goes, and if you need more pointers. HTH.


I do, I do, I do
--Bikini Kill


Exactly what I expected (none / 0) (#50)
by Kabn on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 08:33:31 PM PST
Hahaha. That is pretty good. If it was meant as a joke, good writing. If not, here goes the bio.

First of all, I have more than my share of prospects. Now that you mention it, in the last week, I've had one girl I've known since grade school ask me if I would have sex with her before she went back to school, and another has already asked me to come up and spend the weekend ASAP.

I'm a freshman CIS major, already with a job managing over 20,000 mailboxes. When I get out, in case you're wondering, the median income for my major in the area is $42,000 a year. I think I'll be able to afford a little more than a double-wide, as long as I stay single.

Don't ask me why I'm not a "sexual being." I just don't have a strong libido; I don't crave sex.

Many of my friends consider me the most stylish in the group (black leather coat, khakis, designer jeans, brown boots, black square-toes, the basics). I have pictures if you'd like. By the way, I'm 6'1", 160 pounds, 7.4% body fat. I only know from my physiology class. I got the minor acne fixed up years ago.

I've explored the "am I gay" avenue; I'm not attracted to men, and I am attracted to women. I'm just not filled with an overwhelming desire to have sex with them.

"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

Say whaT? (none / 0) (#51)
by MessiahWWKD on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 09:21:17 PM PST
First of all, I have more than my share of prospects. Now that you mention it, in the last week, I've had one girl I've known since grade school ask me if I would have sex with her before she went back to school, and another has already asked me to come up and spend the weekend ASAP.


She is most likely overweight. Otherwise, she would not have had to ask you for sexual relations. If she is actually attractive and this actually happened, then the only explanation for rejecting her would be that you are a homosexual or in love with yourself.
I've explored the "am I gay" avenue; I'm not attracted to men, and I am attracted to women. I'm just not filled with an overwhelming desire to have sex with them.


There are only two kinds of people who do not have an overwhelming desire to have sex: women and Mormons. Unless you are a Mormon, you are obviously lying.
Guardian angel, heavenly friend, walk with me 'til the journey's end.

Wow (none / 0) (#52)
by Kabn on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 09:56:56 PM PST
Wow, Messiah, your close-mindedness apparently seeps into all your arguments. Apparently, if people think or act outside your idea of a social norm, they are lying. Heh.

First of all, there were two. Read. The first one is cute, probably 5'9", 115. Second one is a college volleyball player, very fit, 5'5", less than 100. Pictures of both, again, just ask.

God, you think just because someone doesn't share in your mostly self-destructive, ancient, primitive urges, there must be something wrong with them. But know the difference: I respect your decision to be that way, I just don't agree with it and have been giving reasons why. I'll say it one more time: I am attracted to women, but for now, I choose to contain it. If you can't understand and respect that, I pity you and your simple, single-minded ways.

I'm not going to post anymore on this, I don't believe I can put it any clearer. Good discussion while it lasted, though.


"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

I'll shatter one myth at a time for you: (none / 0) (#53)
by elenchos on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 12:26:51 AM PST
Numero uno: A black leather coat is not stylish. A black leather coat is geekwear. Hello? You think you are the first computer guy to rush out and buy the same clothes they wore in "The Matrix"?

Who else dresses like that? I mean besides psychotic high school mass murderers? Who? Goths?

We're trying to help you here. Isn't it time for the denial to end?

Oh, and "double wide" was not a reference to the kind of home you can afford, you money-obsessed tech head. Double wide is a metaphor for sex, and "double wide with car port" is a metaphor for "sex with commitment"? See?

Now pay attention and do what we tell you. We're going to get you into some sex. Alluring, no?


I do, I do, I do
--Bikini Kill


you're a prince among men. (none / 0) (#54)
by nathan on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 01:20:00 AM PST
elenchos - old buddy - friend - inspiration - do you think you could, uh, help me with same?

Your pal,
Nathan

PS - please don't answer that my diary would stop being funny...
--
Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

Yeah, yeah, sure. (none / 0) (#57)
by elenchos on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 01:20:52 PM PST
Start with all that stuff I said above, and see how that goes. Report back and I'll tell you more.


I do, I do, I do
--Bikini Kill


Love ? (none / 0) (#60)
by adaptr on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 06:11:27 PM PST
I don't necessarliy disagree with the honourable Kabn's opinions *of his own life, mind you!*
and realise that I run the risk of going completely against the spirit of adequacy.org, but has he ever been in *love* ?
Considering his original post and the replies it got (both serious and mocking), it strikes me that all conversation centers around things, alpha male attitude and sex.
If you have ever truly loved a girl / woman, I wonder why this doesn't seem at all apparent from the way you describe relationships - and yes, I pose that you DO discuss *relations*, a relation is meaningless without sex, in fact sex may account for more than 50% of the 'net' relationship.
Before you jump out again and repeat that you are not particularly interested (and by all means do) I suggest you ask people about this sort of thing - or read a little about it.

techno will save the world yet

#1680 (none / 0) (#63)
by elenchos on Sun Jan 20th, 2002 at 12:01:49 AM PST

    Somtimes with the Heart
    Seldom with the Soul
    Scarcer once with the Might
    Few -- love at all

    --Emily Dickinson
If this guy wanted to go on living his own life as it is without concern for anyone else's reaction to his archtypal pathetic geek situation, why did he post it here and describe it in such detail? I know a cry for help when I see one, and while it would be nice to get him to fall in looooove, how is he ever going to do that if he doesn't get out there and date?

On the net? What, like some beautifully pure Platonic thing? Sure, that's great. But if the beautiful Platonic love thing that abounds on the net was so fulfilling, what is he doing posting these transparent cries for some light out of this darkness he is lost in?

I don't know what makes you get going on all that alpha male stuff. Is that a code word for not hating sex?


I do, I do, I do
--Bikini Kill


Platonic love (none / 0) (#64)
by nathan on Sun Jan 20th, 2002 at 09:00:35 AM PST
...is more or less the point of osm's article.

Nathan
--
Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

 
Just for the record (none / 0) (#69)
by Kabn on Tue Jan 22nd, 2002 at 10:13:16 AM PST
Yeah, black leather jackets aren't stylish; what would Kenneth Cole, J. Crew, Versace, and Giorgio Armani know?


"Instead of going out tonight, punch yourself in the nuts three times and the heart twice. This will save you approximately $75" -theonion.com

Are they in denial too? (none / 0) (#70)
by Robert Reginald Rodriguez on Wed Jan 23rd, 2002 at 04:15:46 AM PST
BTW, Armani is about ten years out of style. But you knew that, right?


 
mormons dont have sex drive (none / 0) (#68)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Jan 21st, 2002 at 10:30:55 PM PST
I am mormon. not a very good one though. i m 17. i have much of a sex drive. at my worst, i have "beaten" it more than 10 times in 24 hours(1 day)[that is the honest to god truth]. and as far as women not wanting any, you must surround your self with the most horny women, but just a moment too late. i really hope that you are joking about that whole incest thing, because, through personal observation, that is just not so.


 
Curiousities (none / 0) (#71)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jan 27th, 2002 at 10:21:04 AM PST
The article itself I have to say was as twisted as I have ever seen. Biblically, you don't see baby Jesus getting it on with his mother Mary and I have to say there is no other case like that anywhere else. The punishing, I see spanking, but not beating. If sex is so good over in Germany, then that explains why sexual disease are so vastly spread through out the world. Lack of morals as well as waiting for that perfect one. Granted some people have sex before they are married and in cases that just happens. I could say more, but they I would start ranting.


 
Not funny at all... (1.00 / 1) (#14)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 03:38:50 PM PST
...ignorant and rather tasteless to boot. Goodbye.


 
U never been in germany have u?? (1.00 / 2) (#15)
by Soyweiser on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 03:51:43 PM PST
look englisch - german translation of the word rape, at this site:

http://dict.leo.org/?search=rape&searchLoc=0&relink=on&deStem=standard&lang=en

and rape is an offence in germany. (i live in holland so we are neigbours) u are wrong...


so this is a stupid article.. (little bit of research please...)


 
You are sick (1.00 / 1) (#16)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 03:53:18 PM PST
That is so horribly sick and wrong. What these people are doing is not sexualy stimulating a child, they are molesting a child! The child does not get any pleasure out of it. Molesting a child does not make them more sexualy open. I know because I have experienced it. I was molested by a family member when I was a child. Because of it I have sever emotional problems. I am anything but sexually open. Because of my molestation I have always connected sex with shame and emotional pain. That little "family secret" has destroyed my life and any chance I ever had of a normal, healthy sexual relationship.


ummm idiot. (none / 0) (#23)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 05:05:26 PM PST
I can't believe this site isn't a joke, the fact that there are actually people out there that think like whoever wrote this article frightens me. You are a sick sick individual. Not only is your article completely inaccurate it's obscene.


no, it isn't a joke (none / 0) (#43)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 04:52:38 AM PST
the purpose of the article is to encite rational debate about a very important and emotive subject.

It's exactly these kind of hysterical, knee-jerk reactions which prevent the topic of paedophilia being properly addressed, and stop people being able to differentiate between sexual abuse and normal, healthy relationships and sexual development.

Many times I've been watching TV and someone will say "that's disgusting, paedophilic..." when a baby's bum gets kissed in a nappy advert. The fact that such a normal, healthy thing is thought "disgusting" is very sad - I think that (in part) is what osm was talking about.


Bullshit (none / 0) (#62)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 07:45:51 PM PST
Frankly, Bullshit.<p>
Its either the worst type of humor or idiocy. There is No scientific basis for the info and most of it is factuall, obviously wrong. Theres a concept of race in Germanic society. There isn't a single scientific study to support any of this bullshit and its just stupid and sophmoric at best.


Literature review (none / 0) (#66)
by Robert Reginald Rodriguez on Sun Jan 20th, 2002 at 08:49:38 PM PST
That was fast. You're absolutely certain that the scientific world agrees with you? Or maybe you are helplessly in the grip of society's taboos, and unable to cope with the idea that, maybe, just possibly, taboos about how children are to be treated by their parents are actually damaging to the children. Consider that many cultures outside America (and yes, even inside) fondle the genitals of children to sooth them. Is this idea disgusting to you? Why?


thank you, RRR (none / 0) (#67)
by nathan on Sun Jan 20th, 2002 at 08:56:16 PM PST
...for striking yet another of your courageous blows against American cultural experialism.

Nathan
--
Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

 
Are you sure (5.00 / 1) (#37)
by osm on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 12:14:58 AM PST
that being "molested" by a family member caused you this emotional distress? If that act had been committed in isolation, without a society placing it's perverse ideas about sexuality on you, would you be so emotionally troubled?


 
Disgusting! (5.00 / 2) (#18)
by MessiahWWKD on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 04:28:00 PM PST
I never thought I'd see the day when Adequacy was supporting the Germans. And I thought Linux advocates were sickening...
Anyway, I completely agree about the sexual stimulation of a child. As a man who has experienced many sexual relations during my childhood, I have grown up very well and am living a successful life as an adopted son of a wealthy Jewish family.
Guardian angel, heavenly friend, walk with me 'til the journey's end.

Messiah. (none / 0) (#41)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 03:47:22 AM PST
You complain about Themes.org, why cant you just shut up and accept things? Oh, and you complain about the GPL. You're an idiot.
-daft
FUT
COM
KER


 
What a coincidence (5.00 / 3) (#19)
by First Incision on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 04:36:52 PM PST
Today, in class, our physiology professor was telling us about cystic fibrosis. He was from Germany. He had a thick German accent. He even said "Ja" rather than "yeah."

One of the signs of cystic fibrosis is an overproduction of salt in the sweat.

He said that most parents discovered cystic fibrosis in their children after licking them. All us students threw confused looks at each other. He said "Ven you are parents, you vill find yourself licking your babies all the time, ja?"
_
_
Do you suffer from late-night hacking? Ask your doctor about Protonix.

 
Righty Ho.... (none / 0) (#24)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 05:06:23 PM PST
WTF?

ok. Its true and has been for years. THe internet truly does bring out the best in people as witnessed by this astute, keen and most of all highly intelligent piece of writing. This screams of PhD caliber uberPeodephile rant. Someone send this guy a NAMBLA sticker set and web address.


lol (none / 0) (#26)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 05:24:14 PM PST
This site is hillarious, on par with satirewire and the onion, the best one is "why we need a national missle defence" hillarious, keep up the funny writings.


 
sickness (1.00 / 1) (#27)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 06:48:12 PM PST
This had to come from one sick human being! Who ever wrote this should be exicuted because if they feel this way you know they are stimulating their children. Which in this country is called molestation and if they like the German Traditions so much maybe they should go live over there and get their sick perverted self out of our country!


 
Mmhmm... (none / 0) (#29)
by Evil Laugher on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 07:19:30 PM PST
It's ironic how you say "the Age of Oprah", when Oprah was sexually abused as a child.
Chickadee?

 
Ah, now I get it! (none / 0) (#32)
by poltroon on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 08:24:50 PM PST
One time when I was sitting by a bushy hedge in a Berlin park, a guy came along and wiggled his wiener at me. Feeling rather affronted, I promptly darted away. But, d'oh, now I get it! He was sexually liberated, while the USian that I am, I behaved like a total prude.


Re: Ah, now I get it! (none / 0) (#34)
by Vanetiahime on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 09:08:47 PM PST
LOL!


 
LOL (none / 0) (#72)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jan 27th, 2002 at 11:01:44 AM PST
call it a hand shaking experience


 
Clarification (5.00 / 1) (#33)
by Vanetiahime on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 09:00:21 PM PST
Joke or not...that's so..that's just wrong..wrong on SO many levels.

"I dare anyone reading this article to attempt to survive a year without sexual contact of any sort. Not even masturbation. Imagine the seething, raw anger that would build within your gut."
I was never angry that I didn't do such things. I didn't even discover masturbation until 14. I was also a very shy and kind child (going off other's opinions, not my own). I've gone for long periods of time without sexual gratification and have never once been angry or even on edge over it.

As for the whole "The Sado-Masochism Perversion" thing: I have many friends who's parents didn't so much as spank them as kids. They didn't grow up wanting to be spanked by their partners. I'd like to see some actual scientific studies relating to this if there even are any (which I doubt)

For the whole "The Infidelity Perversion" thing: I've never once been unfaithful to my husband. Everyone I know (save for one person) has been faithful to their partners and they sure as hell haven't "got it on" with their parent of the opposite sex.

The whole "The Homosexuality Perversion" thing: I am NOT homosexual and have never been touched by my father in such a way.

""Maybe I'm not supposed to like daddy," ponders young Suzy."

You're right Suzy! You're NOT! That's called incest! There's a difference between familiar love and romantic love. It's up to the parents to teach the difference.

"Rape is another man-made perversion. The concept shouldn't even exist in society. The concept of rape is only meaningful in the context of sex as a bad thing. This is probably the greatest problem our nation must overcome: the idea that sex is bad."

Rape and sex are not the same thing. That's the same as saying all humans are male. Rape is more often used by the perpetrator to express his superiority and power over his victim not to get off on the experience.
Sex is not thought of as bad. Promiscuous sex is thought of as DANGEROUS with the many STI's (or STD's) out there that can prove harmful/fatal.

"The German people have no concept of rape. There is no word for it in the German language and there are no rape statistics for Germany."

This is a bit out of date and I could probably find something more recent if I took the time, however I wont for the moment. In 1995, Germany had reported that out of 100,000 females:
7.4 had been raped or had an attempt on them
6.4 had been sexually assaulted
12 had forcible rape outside of marriage
(Sources: Polizeiliche Kriminalstatistik of the German Bundeskriminalamt, National Crime Victimization Survey, and the Uniform Crime Reports.)
And, by the way, I used three different translation systems and all came up with the word "Raub" as German for rape.

"Family pets must be neutered."

So THAT'S why Bob Barker always said that at the end of the show. I always thought it was just to decrease pet populations *rolls eyes*

"Under-stimulated children are also in danger of this affliction. The lack of sexual stimulation can produce an intense obsession with body excretions."

That sounds like a load of bull to me and I'd like to to show some scientific studies to back up that claim (as if there are any.)

The whole "The Necrophilia Perversion" thing: The reason a person tends to become a Necrophiliac is because they know the dead can't fight back. For some it's a fear of rejection that drives them to that road. Most Necro's tend to be depressed as well (most likely because of the whole rejection thing). It has nothing to do with a bottle.

I suggest you find some reasearch to back up your claims before throwing out such ludicrous accusations.


Hmmmmm... (2.50 / 2) (#35)
by gcsb on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 09:57:28 PM PST
...and I suggest that you read the Holy Bible to clear your mind of the shroud of lies that Satan has clouded your mind with.

Best Regards,
gcsb.


Sig is under re-construction...do not panic.

Bah (5.00 / 1) (#48)
by Vanetiahime on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 06:57:52 PM PST
I do read the Holy Bible thankyouverymuch.

There is not a single entry in it that says anything along the lines of "fondle your children." Actually I believe the Bible speaks AGAINST such acts.

It was one of the sins named in Sodom (Lot's daughters did this to him. The resulting sons founded the nations of Moab and Ammon which fought with Isreal for centuries trying to get them to sin)

In fact it's plain as day in Leviticus 18:6 all the way through 18:18. It covers most of the family tree as being a no-no for sexual relations. Children are included in this.

I suggest YOU read the Holy Bible, sir and actually take heed of it's warnings. It seems Mr. Devil's pitchfork has been stuck in your ears too long for you to hear the Lord calling out to you.


Reading the Bible (5.00 / 1) (#55)
by Slubberdegullion on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 10:40:56 AM PST
You seem to be taking the Bible entirely literally! Once you mature, I'm sure you will realize that some things must sometimes be read metaphorically, such as the Bible or the Constitution. The Bible, for instance, implies that anyone who has faith in Jesus and asks him to save them will be saved. But it is obvious with just a little bit of thought that cretins such as you could never ascend to Heaven; Jesus' words were obviously meant only for the natural aristocracy.


Metaphors and Life Lessons (none / 0) (#58)
by Vanetiahime on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 02:26:41 PM PST
I do understand to use of metaphor in the Bible, sir.

The passages I pointed out in Leviticus, however, were not metaphors. They weren't used in a story type setting. They were flat out "Don't do this, the Lord says NO."

There's certain times when a story is used to place a point across or help give you better understanding of your day to day life. However there are also passages that simply lay it out in front of you in plain text. "Don't do this", "This is wrong", etc.

The passages in Leviticus were an example of the latter.


 
Da hast du unrecht (none / 0) (#39)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 01:44:06 AM PST
The German word "Raub" translates directly as robbery. This proves that that the German people, having no descriptive term for rape, substituted a generic term roughly meaning "crime" to describe the very rare instances of sexual violence that take place in their country.


Da hast du Unrecht - Teil Zwei (none / 0) (#46)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 03:07:57 PM PST
There's a German word for rape, it is "Vergewaltigung"


 
Keiner von euch hat Recht! (none / 0) (#65)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jan 20th, 2002 at 10:15:28 AM PST
The German people do have a word for rape: Vergewaltigung. Try using a dictionary next time. The article is pretty funny but sometimes the author seems to actually take himself seriously.


 
Maturbation.. (none / 0) (#38)
by The dev0 on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 12:49:31 AM PST
You're perfectly correct. I cut down to sixty strokes a day, and I tell you, splitting them between 4 wanks was terrible! If only i could convince my Mum to do the deed, i'd be laughing!


Never fight naked, unless you're in prison...

 
Pedophilia is a liberal myth (5.00 / 1) (#40)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 01:47:38 AM PST
In precapitalist societies, it was common for women as young as 11 or 12 to get married to 16 or 17 year old males, the better to make the most of their childbearing years. In today's culture such a union, even between consenting individuals, would be condemned as "staturory rape".

This change is a result of "adolescence" being invented by capitalist culture as a way of developing new markets (the zit-cream market, the teen magazine market, the training bra market, etc.). Previously, children underwent adulthood rituals at the age of 11 or 12, and were accepted as full members of society. The sexual stimulation of children in these societies was used to prepare them for the upcoming experiences of adulthood. This perfectly natural practice is still perpetuated in so-called "primitive" cultures, and in certain places in the United States, for example among the Mormon of Utah.

Today, older individuals who are attracted to 12-17 year old girls are labeled pedophiles, whereas a few hundred years ago there would be nothing unusual about their desires. This warping of ordinary human nature is a result of the pressures of so-called "free" market forces. There is a glimmer of hope, however that anti-capitalist forces like the thousands who have had such success in their protests during globalization summits, will also aid in the movement to abolish the pernicious myth of "pedophilia".


ummm (none / 0) (#44)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 10:53:25 AM PST
They got married so young because the life expectancy back then was only 40 years old or so.


dont be an idiot (none / 0) (#45)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 01:09:18 PM PST
Life expectancy is not the same as the rate of infant mortality.
All those old looking people depicted in ancient art work really are old people. Modern medecine has made inconveniences of certain then fatal injuries and sicknesses, but the overwhelming majority of people who survived childhood lived to the same ripe old age you will.


medicare sux (none / 0) (#47)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 06:23:17 PM PST
But if you were 60 year ago, fell down and broke your hip. You better hope your family loved you enough to take care of you or you'd die. In a sense the lack of medical technology help speed natural selection, assuming those that survived reproduced.
Unfortunately they were all reproducing much earlier than that, so my entire point is moot. I'll go back to smoking now. Later.


 
it's not just Germany... (none / 0) (#42)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jan 18th, 2002 at 04:01:35 AM PST
seems to happen in Japan as well.


 
Another German Invention - Nazism (none / 0) (#56)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 12:07:48 PM PST
Not only do Germans lead the world in baby molesting, they also have a lock on the soap and lampshades made of Jews and homosexuals market.




the germans had the right idea (none / 0) (#59)
by osm on Sat Jan 19th, 2002 at 03:52:12 PM PST
just the wrong group of people. they should have been making lampshades and sandals out of fucking left-wing hippies.


 

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