Pet Ownership - Killing Through Kindness

The findings of this research, published in the June issue of the Journal of the American Association of Veterinary Science and Associated Professions, are an unequivocal condemnation of pet owners. The facts, presented below, make chilling reading. For example, the average lifespan of a domesticated dog is four years less than that of a similar dog living in the wild.

Species Domesticated Lifespan (years) Feral Lifespan (years)

Cat 16 19

Dog 12 16

Fish 5 6

Hamster 2 2

Horse 25 29

Rabbit 10 12

Comparative Lifespans of Domesticated and Feral Animals

Dr. Victor O'Neill, the author of this work and a veterinary surgeon for over 25 years, explained that several factors are responsible for foreshortening the lives of domesticated animals.

"Firstly, animals reared in a domestic environment are not exposed to the same pathogens during infancy as wild animals. Therefore, the immune systems of domesticated animals do not develop properly, which leads to a reduced resistance to disease in adulthood."

"However, the main reason for these disturbing findings is that animals do not adapt to domestic life. Animals are simply unhappy when sharing a habitat with humans. Humans attempt to impose their value system upon animals and then punish the animals should they transgress this arbitrary set of rules of which they have no comprehension. These animals, enslaved by human tyrants, eventually lose the will to live, which results in their premature deaths."

Following the publication of his research, O'Neill has formed a pressure group to lobby for a change in the law, outlawing pet ownership. In the short term, O'Neill believes that a change in people's attitudes is necessary.

"Currently, pet ownership is seen as a harmless hobby and people are dependant on their companion animals. However, this research has shown that pet ownership is anything but harmless. People need to realise that it is a cruel institution that must be stopped."

"There are many parallels between pet ownership and the practice of slavery that was widespread in the United States of America during the early part of the last century. Nowadays, the ownership of slaves is socially unacceptable and is rightly acknowledged as a barbaric practice. Pet ownership is exactly the same. I hope that people will come to realise that keeping domesticated animals is morally indefensible and that society will ostracize pet owners."

However, O'Neill's viewpoint has been controversial and unpopular.

"I have recieved innumerable death threats from pet owners. On one occassion my eight year-old daughter was kidnapped and physically assaulted by an enraged pet owner. Animal lovers are notorious for their emotional instability and they rely on their pet animals as a substitute for normal human relationships. My proposals to remove their emotional safety net are anathema to them and it is hardly surprising to see such an irrational reaction."

It is truly inspiring to meet a man such as O'Neill who is willing to risk his personal safety in the fight for a righteous cause. It is indisputable that pet ownership is a vile practice. Humanity will only ever be able to consider itself an advanced civilisation when it outlaws this cruel institution and treats the lesser species with proper respect.

	huh? (none / 0) (#9)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 01:50:54 PM PST

	Is this some kinda parody site, that's some fake-ass research.

	I'm afraid... (2.00 / 1) (#11)
	by CaptainZornchugger on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 02:12:01 PM PST

	That I won't have access to an academic library until this thursday, so I can't look at the journal myself. I don't see any reason why it shouldn't be there, though -- do you know something I don't? Or are you simply perturbed enough by the conclusions that you have reverted to mindless flaming?

	Journal (5.00 / 1) (#13)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 02:48:07 PM PST

	I do have access to a university library and that Journal does not exist, and if Dr. O'Neill has started a organization, there's absolutely no mention of it on the internet. The stories of overzealous pet owners kidnapping kids made me think it was a joke. Was trying to be funny, but almost all animal science points to domesticated cats and dogs and other species living longer in captivity than in the wild. Go ask your local zoo.

	Re: Journal (none / 0) (#15)
	by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 03:47:15 AM PST

	You are absolutely correct, of course. If your university library doesn't have access to the journal because, say, the library is underfunded or it's a fringe journal, then the journal can't possibly exist can it? And if you can't find a mention of Dr. O'Neill's organisation on the Internet, the most reliable of all information sources, then it can't possibly exist, can it? I've just realised - I can't find mention of myself in a university library, or on the Net. That means that I don't exist! So either, my whole life has been an illusion or your logic and ability to find information is at fault.

	The main reason why domesticated pets die early (none / 0) (#10)
	by seventypercent on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 01:58:00 PM PST

	While Dr O'Neill sounds like he might have a few screws loose, I find the conclusion to be pretty accurate. At first, it might seem counter-intuitive .. after all, if animals are fed and cared for, should they not live longer? Yet, I remember growing up as a small child; there was a professional stray cat we named "Bandit" who constantly hung around the neighborhood. The domesticated cats would come and go, but Bandit was there all the way from my kindergarten days until I graduated high school. (He has since disappeared .. presumably his extraordinarily long life has ended.) Part of the reason that domesticated animals perish sooner than their feral counterparts is because of the same lifestyle that leads to premature death in human beings. Americans, in particular, are fatter and lazier than at any time in recent history. We have a culture of convenience that includes remote controls and self-propelled lawn mowers. We'll get into our cars to drive two blocks to pick up a gallon of milk. We eat terrible foods, and in general lie around and do nothing. This results in a society of people prone to heart attacks, strokes, and accidents resulting from tripping / falling / etc. This lifestyle permeates that of our pets. We feed them limitless food, pamper them with pillows and blankets, shelter them from ever having to (gasp!) do something themselves, and in general, keep them from encountering situations that would allow them to better themselves physically and spiritually. And yet we have the unmitigated gall to act surprised when our pets curl up and croak years before their number should be up. Medical science for humans has advanced to the point where it is possible for us to be fat and lazy and still lead a pretty long life. However, the same is not true of medical science for pets. Vets can do a lot of wonderful things, but not much can be done with a 10-year old diabetic cat with clogged arteries and 5 pounds of excess body fat. I think our pets can live longer lives, but we've got to stop being so damned nice to them and start challenging them. Give Rover a good, swift kick in the ribs every now and then to get the adrenaline pumping. Lock Fluffy outside during a severe thunderstorm in order to make sure the survival instinct doesn't die from being unused. "Forget" to feed Fido for a week or so. Oh, sure, the PETA people might not like it, but in the end, isn't a few extra years of companionship and unconditional love worth it? -- Red-blooded patriots do not use Linux.

	Right O (none / 0) (#12)
	by Sylvester Q McNamera on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 02:28:55 PM PST

	You're God Damned right. We need to start a little tough love with our pets. Shit, my pet lives the life of a fucking commando, he has to make it through the random strafing with automatic weapons, slither under the barbed wire fence, and deal with an occasional baseball bat upside his head. And that's just to get his fucking doggy breakfast. Okay, so there isn't a whole lot of love in his little canine heart, but as long as the bugger stays on his toes he should live a long life. Best wishes, --S.Q. McNamera

	Why not stop slaughtering other domestics too? (none / 0) (#14)
	by kezgin on Tue Jul 10th, 2001 at 03:24:30 PM PST

	While I don't what kind of fish live for 5 years in captivity(aside from sharks maybe) some of the things mentioned do kind of make sense, especially the pathogen thing. Although, I highly doubt any type of progress will ever be made in this arena(this coming from someone who is extremely pro animal rights), it's a noble goal. Make a difference in our society. End it.

	Pets and Slavery (none / 0) (#16)
	by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 10:46:30 AM PST

	Anyone who thinks that humans are enslaving pets have never lived with a cat. They might wear the collars, but it's the humans who do their bidding. I suggest that people who think this article is real should go read some history on the domestication of animals. It's facinating and not at all an oppressive history.

	Sure, whatever you say... (none / 0) (#17)
	by GoldbergsPants on Wed Jul 11th, 2001 at 01:05:37 PM PST

	We'll let all our pets go then. I'll just go and put my fish out on the lawn and the cat. It'll be a loyalty test, see who's still there when I go back and check. Cats that are allowed outdoors tend to live shorter lives than cats that are indoor cats. Particularly in the town I live in with bears, coyotes, wolves, cougars... The only pets I've ever had go "full term" were my dog who died recently at the age of 14 (GSD) and my wifes cat (that lived with her mother) at the ripe old age of 17 or 18. It was so old nobody could remember. Just don't get me started on hamsters. The most volatile pets imaginable. Or fish for that matter. You only have to look at them funny and they cark it... If this were really happening, you'd be wearing womens underwear.

	Happy (none / 0) (#18)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jul 12th, 2001 at 01:10:52 PM PST

	"Animals are simply unhappy when sharing a habitat with humans." Umm.. Sure. Tell that to my dog. She seems to love it! Always wagging her tail and ready to lick you in the face. Of course we treat her very good, let her hang out with us, and toss her yummy treats while having dinner. I know she gets bored sometimes sitting around during the day when no one is there (although she has toys to chew on and stuff), but she certainly makes the best of the time she has when everyone gets home from work! Seems like a pretty happy animal to me.