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 This is disturbing.

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
May 10, 2002
 Comments:
In French. Translation inside.
diaries

More diaries by em
Stuck in Canada
back from Canada...
`We support collateral damage. Hooray for the baby killers!'
Life imitates fiction
Cuidao, que viene la jara...
Raving paranoid readers
This is bizarre
"The cow is the simple happiness of nature: the goodness of her milk and her presence in our countryside make her the nicest animal on the planet. The cow is beautiful, calm and generous.
We love her!
Lavache.com is the site for all cow lovers. Its objective is for us to gather, exchange our memories, our most beautiful photos or stories, educate ourselves, and protect her from men that drive her crazy."

Neat, eh?


Cows (none / 0) (#1)
by bc on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 05:46:55 AM PST
Cows are evil. When I look at a cow, I don't see a kindred spirit, a fellow traveller on this world. I don't see a soul. I see a twisted, tortured malevolence behind its dead eyes. When I see a cow in a field, I shiver and turn away towards happier beasts, like sheepdogs or truculent pigs. Cows overpower me, it is almost like they are biding their time.

I don't like farm animals in general, they are scary beasts, they bite & nip & chase. I've been chased by cows and butted by goats and kicked by horses, nowadays I'm a city boy and keep away from these animals.

Of course, it is a bit emasculating, a beautiful woman laughing at you because you are too scared to pat her horse, but better to be safe than sorry.

The countryside is evil, and cows in particular, as well as other large herbivorous domesticated animals, and also lizards, fish and birds, (all of which have dead, cowlike eyes) can all sod off. I only like creatures which are:

  • Mammalian
  • Predatory
  • Land living (not flying or swimming)
All other creatures can keep away as far as I'm concerned.


♥, bc.

Well I never. (none / 0) (#3)
by dmg on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 07:35:21 AM PST
You were "Butted" by a goat ? Believe me, I do not even want to imagine what this "butting" might involve.

time to give a Newtonian demonstration - of a bullet, its mass and its acceleration.
-- MC Hawking

Butting (none / 0) (#4)
by bc on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 08:10:41 AM PST
Is what angry & horny goats do to young boy's backsides.


♥, bc.

 
Obviously, (none / 0) (#5)
by hauntedattics on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 08:14:19 AM PST
bc has some deep-seated issues, for why else would he lash out in such an hysterical and irrational fashion at such lovely, placid, dairy product-providing creatures as cows?

Thanks for the website link, em. It's a beautiful thing.



 
Cows (5.00 / 1) (#9)
by Right Hand Man on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 11:25:30 AM PST
I have some cows. And goats. I think you may be mistaking their hollow gaze for malevolence or anger. In reality, their gaze is hollow because they are simple creatures that God has provided with only enough mental faculties to chew grass and lumber about. They are no deeper than that.

Indeed, when cows or goats appear to be annoyed with human presence and show anger, I think they are really just under the mistaken impression that the person is trying to steal their supply of grass. My cows will moo loudly when I walk into their pasture. My goats will sometimes make fake charges at me. In both cases a stiff slap to the head with a length of stick reminds them that I am the one who runs the show.


-------------------------
"Keep your bible open and your powder dry."

 
RobotSlave! RobotSlave! Quick quick (none / 0) (#2)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 06:04:38 AM PST
delete this diary! This em character has stolen the copyright of the original author by translating and publishing their IP without any permission. Now that's not fair use. Or parody. It's theft


BrainSeller! BrainSeller! Quick quick (none / 0) (#6)
by hauntedattics on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 08:17:44 AM PST
sell this poor AR a brain! This AR character can't even tell the difference between copyright violation and providing a community service through translation of others' material into a common language. Now that's not fair. Or kind. It's brainless.



Dura lex, sed lex. [n/t] (none / 0) (#7)
by because it isnt on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 08:36:09 AM PST

adequacy.org -- because it isn't

Ignorantia iuris nocet. [n/t] (none / 0) (#8)
by Icebox on Fri May 10th, 2002 at 08:47:31 AM PST



 

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