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Poll
The best band is...?
Michael W. Smith 0%
Delerious 0%
Stryper 22%
Divine Regale 0%
DC Talk 22%
Dream Theater 11%
early U2 33%
MXPX 11%
P.O.D. 0%
King's X 0%

Votes: 9

 Mint Waltman Internet Ministry!

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Sep 27, 2001
 Comments:
Hello! First off, introductions all around! My name is Mint Waltman. I wish I could post a pic, but perhaps that's for the better! lol! Don't let the shaggy hair and open collar fool ya. I'm not going to break into your house, or sell cigarettes to your kids.
diaries

More diaries by Mint Waltman
Was the Bible open-source?
Actually, I'm a DJ at the Rollerworld here in Climax Scotts, MI. It's a great gig, and it gives me a voice to reach the public. Of course I play all the old standards, "Roll Over Beethoven" by ELO, Bachman Turner Overdrive, REO Speedwagon... But I always slip in a few songs with a positive, life-affirming message. The great thing is, when I play "Jesus Freak" by DC Talk it never fails to turn heads, and hearts, towards something more vital- The Kingdom of God. I love that Christian music and youth culture has taken a hipper, 'down with it' tact. For years it burned me that we Christians had to deal with unsavory people like Kurt Cobain and Ozzy Osbourne for the souls of our youth. But now that Kurt Cobain is in hell, and Ozzy Osbourne hasn't had a hit in years, it's given us a chance to take back our culture- out of the gutter and into the pews! Not only is DC Talk ABSOLUTELY HUGE, playing in front of thousands of teenagers at Aquire the Fire youth conventions, or up front and center on nationally televised Billy Graham specials, they're also opening hearts to the Word of God. I also love those t-shirts that say 'Christ,' but it looks like the Coke logo- or the ones that read "I believe in Jesus Christ" instead of "I believe in Crystal Lite."

Anyway, the job at Rollerworld covers my rent, and always leaves me with a humble sum to send to Pat Robertson's Christian Broadcast Network in order to support great programs like the 700 Club or Solid-Rock Videos. But my heart truely lies with my other, more Holy endeavors- my work with area church youth-groups. I feel I can relate to today's young people and gain their trust because I know what it's like to deal with peer-pressure, and not know where to turn for help.

Back in the 80's when I was attending Nazareth College, my girlfriend of 6 months, Faith, was pressuring me to engage in 'heavy petting.' I didn't know what to do. My roommate told me that 'it feels good,' but I was also concerned about how it would feel after the act. Would I still be able to look at myself in the mirror? They were trying times for sure, but through prayer and ministry I finally saw the light. I had to break up with Faith (my girlfriend, not my belief that there is one God, and he gave his only Son to die for our sins). Pastor Arnold helped me realize that if she truely did love me like she said, she wouldn't have been pressuring me to forsake my mortal soul a few brief minutes of digital manipulatory bliss commited outside the sanctity of the matrimonial bed. I know what you're saying to yourselves, "Do you think you're perfect Mint? You think your poop doesn't smell bad?" My answer to that is a resounding 'No.' I am not perfect. Only one man, Jesus, could make such a claim. Occasionally temptation and lust do get the better of me. Mint Waltman has indeed been a bit of a voluptuary from time to time.

A few years after college I began to have thoughts that could only have been placed in my head by Lucifer himself. "What might a woman's vagina look like? What would it FEEL like?" In a moment of weakness at my friend Jonathon's bachelor party I allowed myself to watch a pornographic film called 'Basic Instinct.' During one of the love-making scenes Jonathon giddily peeped "I'm gonna get to do that tomorrow night." We all laughed, but I think he was just trying to mask his nervousness. I'd be nervous too, but I have to admit, a small part of me envied him. Was I coveting his soon-to-be wife? As I continued to watch this Stag Film I couldn't help but question my own moral fiber. I reached the breaking point when the very pretty actress uncrossed her legs, exposing her womanly virtue for a group of men (and any children who might have accidently been in the area) to gawk and drool over. Excusing myself, I went to the bathroom, dropped to my knees and began to pray, "Please God give me the strength to rid my mind of all that is unHoly. I need you to help me in this moment of doubt." An estatic feeling coursed through my body. I fell to the ground shaking as the Hand of God touched me. The warmth, the spiritual and physical estacy of closeness with one's creator was an experience I'll remember for the rest of my days. My pants were saturated with a curious liquid. I'm not Catholic, but could this be the Stigmata? I am truely blessed. Fifteen minutes later, I emerged from the bathroom, from hence forward a new man. Everyone gave me a round of applause- but how could they know what had just happened? "I've just had the most incredible experience of my life," I announced. They cheered, and Jonathon's cousin Curtis told me, "Yeah, I make sure I have one of those two, sometimes three times a day." To tell you the truth I thought Curtis was kind of a slob. He smokes, I heard he drinks alcohol, and it was his idea to rent the movie. I had no idea he was so spiritual. So why am I telling you all this? The Lord works in mysterious ways. The fact that you even found this diary makes me wonder if God had it planned all along. This internet is a glorious God-sent gift (unless you're using it for pornography, in which case I will pray 4 u), a way for the Mint Waltman Internet Ministry to spread the Word of God. Just the first day I logged on I brought someone into the fold. I hope to post the transcript soon. It just goes to show you what kind of great things we can make happen using this new technology. I challenge you to also make a difference! Well, I've gone on long enough! News about the Mint Waltman Internet Ministry Pizza Party and my matriculation into The Promise Keepers to come!


Your poll needs a "None of the Above" en (none / 0) (#1)
by Starship Trooper on Thu Sep 27th, 2001 at 01:29:02 PM PST
But essentially, "Best Musician" polls are an inherently flawed proposition. It would take thousands of choices in order to cover the preferences of any group of people (even a relatively small one such as Adequacy) in an even, "fair" way. And, if you think about it, does it really matter who the "best" band/musician/boy band/girl group/whatever is? After all, nothing is stopping you from listening to everything you want to, and eschewing the music you don't.
---
A seasoned witch could call you from the depths of your disgrace, and rearrange your liver to the solid mental grace

Yes, but the poll does present a panoply of glory (5.00 / 1) (#7)
by Mint Waltman on Fri Sep 28th, 2001 at 08:17:11 AM PST
That the list of possible best bands would overlap substantially with a list of my favorite bands is pure coincidence. The best band will surely deliver a positive message concerning our Lord and His plan for us. Most current music fails miserably at this highest of all possible callings, and frankly, should be made illegal. To be sure, I was highly objective in crafting this poll. To merely ask others at Adequacy to confirm my good taste by presenting a list of my favorite bands would be prideful, and rest assured, that is truely terra incognita to Mint Waltman!


 
Praise the Lord! (5.00 / 3) (#2)
by Avicula on Thu Sep 27th, 2001 at 03:15:57 PM PST
For He is great!

An estatic feeling coursed through my body. I fell to the ground shaking as the Hand of God touched me. The warmth, the spiritual and physical estacy of closeness with one's creator was an experience I'll remember for the rest of my days. My pants were saturated with a curious liquid. I'm not Catholic, but could this be the Stigmata? I am truely blessed.

Stigmata:

There is five of them. As a practicing Catholic myself, I believe I should educate you in that (and where the h*** have you been raised?!?!) The Five of them are distributed as follows: one for each palm of the hand of our Savior, and one for each instep of the feet of our Savior, and one in the side of our Savior. All of them together compose The Stigmata, plural of stigma(latin: "sign").

Now as for the liquid you found... I have to tell you: That is the work of the devil himself. If you would have been educated in our belief properly (which I have to doubt due to what you innocently posted here) you would know that bliss is forsaken to us humble creatures, crawling this earth in humility.

My son and brother in Jesus our Savior, cleanse yourself and repent! Self-castigation is the only thing that can save your soul!!!!! You have betrayed God the Lord by your actions and walked the path of satan.

Praise the Lord - for He is great!

For in His infinite wisdom, He led you to helping hands to help yourself. He taught you how to fish and fishing you have been, and as you retract your net, you shall find us helping you out of the sins that you suffer. For your soul shall not be lost to the eternal heavens.


*.avi



Don't rate this. If God the Lord wanted you to rate, He would have put appropriate buttons on each of us. Praise the Lord - for He is great!

blasphemer (none / 0) (#4)
by johnny ambiguous on Thu Sep 27th, 2001 at 06:47:33 PM PST
I have to tell you: That is the work of the devil himself. If you would have been educated in our belief properly (which I have to doubt due to what you innocently posted here) you would know that bliss is forsaken to us humble creatures, crawling this earth in humility.

Blasphemy, blasphemy, blasphemy! Atheist worm, dare you to denigrate the sublime miracle experienced so gaspingly, so throbbingly, by the sainted Teresa of Avila?

...When he pulled it out...the pain was so severe that it made me utter several moans. The sweetness caused by this intense pain is so extreme that one can not possibly wish it to cease...

Which of the Lord's blessings will you deny? Hell yawns for you, apostate!

Yours Johnny A.


Getting into my Chevrolet Magic Fire, I drove slowly back to the office. - L. Rosen

Please... (5.00 / 1) (#6)
by Avicula on Fri Sep 28th, 2001 at 06:23:00 AM PST
Johnny A. wrote:
Blasphemy, blasphemy, blasphemy! Atheist worm, dare you to denigrate the sublime miracle experienced so gaspingly, so throbbingly, by the sainted Teresa of Avila?

I ask you to read my comments with more care next time. I was not referring to any saint whatsoever.
I humbly ask you, to think in response of this post. Of course, this might have been written in fury and anger, but our Lord tells us to forgive one another and care for the enemy.
I forgive you and pray for you.

Praise the Lord - for He is great!

*.avi



Don't rate this. If God the Lord wanted you to rate, He would have put appropriate buttons on each of us. Praise the Lord - for He is great!

 
An idea (none / 0) (#8)
by Logical Analysis on Fri Sep 28th, 2001 at 09:51:43 AM PST
LOL! Perhaps Teresa could be the star of a new television series, "Fucked By An Angel."


 
I warmly welcome you to adequacy (5.00 / 1) (#3)
by Adam Rightmann on Thu Sep 27th, 2001 at 03:57:46 PM PST
and feel free to recommend this site to your friends. It's good to see such Godly sorts here.
<p>
I'm heartened to see that such good folk attend Nazareth, as my neice and nephew may (my sister-in-law works there, and would they would get free tuition).


A. Rightmann

 
Your music choices suck. (5.00 / 1) (#5)
by nx01 on Thu Sep 27th, 2001 at 11:16:07 PM PST
Please, consider some of the greats:

Carman
Sandi Patty
Al Denson
Point of Grace
Avalon
Twila Paris

Next time, I expect to see more good, clean Christian music instead of "Christian Rock" devil-filth like "Striper", "Delerious"*, "Dream Theater", "early U2", "Magnified Plaid" "Stave's Acre" or "White Heart".

* Now THERE'S a name for a Christian band! deliberate drug-use innuendo!


"Every time I look at the X window system, it's so fucking stupid; and part of me feels responsible for the worst parts of it."
-- James Gosling

 

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